I feel more lonely hanging out in groups than when I’m alone

I just got back from a friendmas (Christmas party with friends). Besides thinking about the evolution of the word “party”, I was hung up on the fact that I felt lonely and awkward, as everyone seemed unexcited, tired, and slow.

It’s ironic. I feel great alone, enjoying my internet, watching my YouTube/shows/movies, and reading my reddit/articles. But when I’m out around actual people, it can feel more boring and lonely because I’m no longer in my element. And I’m quietly being awkward lol.

I just need to socialize with people more like myself tbh. But there aren’t many. Maybe Dorothy and Brandon? Idk… And David?



My Secret Notebook

Quirky, curious, and philosophical Asian American gay Ivy League grad living in Southern California.