I feel more lonely hanging out in groups than when I’m alone

I just got back from a friendmas (Christmas party with friends). Besides thinking about the evolution of the word “party”, I was hung up on the fact that I felt lonely and awkward, as everyone seemed unexcited, tired, and slow.

It’s ironic. I feel great alone, enjoying my internet, watching my YouTube/shows/movies, and reading my reddit/articles. But when I’m out around actual people, it can feel more boring and lonely because I’m no longer in my element. And I’m quietly being awkward lol.

I just need to socialize with people more like myself tbh. But there aren’t many. Maybe Dorothy and Brandon? Idk… And David?

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My Secret Notebook

Quirky, curious, and philosophical Asian American gay Ivy League grad living in Southern California.