I want to retire early (net worth breakdown/FIRE)

My Secret Notebook
2 min readNov 4, 2022

I realized I really want to retire early and just raise kids without working. I’ve avoided saying I want to FIRE/fatFIRE because it might not be possible/doable or I might not achieve it. But what the heck, I do want it.

So I wanted to reevaluate my motived/desires and do an inventory check. Inventory check first. Here are my assets:

  1. $1-1.2M — in real estate equity
  2. $30K— in cash
  3. $25K — work stock options
  4. $85K — work 401K
  5. $23.5K — ROTH IRA
  6. $10K — bonds
  7. $38K — stocks

In total, my net worth is $1.2–1.4M. My properties are generating ~30K in rent cashflow before maintenance costs each year. My income is ~$115–117K before rental income.

It’s not really a lot, not enough to retire. The fact that it’s over $1M is nice though, but I don’t think I can make it.

My priorities are maintaining flexibility to explore other interests, but even my other interests can feel empty and dumb. Having a kid can sometimes feel overwhelming too. But it’s something I want to do.

As a gay man, I’m looking to get a surrogate child. I probably have $93–103K in liquid cash/stocks, which is not enough for a surrogate baby, which would cost $180–220K. I’m just not financially in the best spot.

I don’t like working at other places though (I don’t like working in general lol.) And I need this chill-ish job.

1 year ago, I set myself on a path to try ventures/business ideas to make more side money. They’ve mostly ended up fizzling out due to lack of consistency. And I’ve just been in the red on these hobbies. I honestly don’t mind because they’re interesting hobbies, but I’m not on track to retire early with kids.

The guy I fell in love with isn’t good at finances relatively speaking, and is still looking for his first office job.

We could live a decent life with 1–2 kids, but we’d have to work. I’m 32 right now, turning 33 soon. And if I am to have a baby in 4 years, which is the plan, most of my cash I’ll be saving would go to surrogacy costs.

What a nightmare lol.

If anything, it makes most sense for Roy to stay at home for the kid(s) before they go to daycare.

Damn, must be nice to be my baby mama’s wife lol. Although tired, she just stays at home to care for the 2 kids, and they have a nanny too.

But time to ask what I keep re-asking. What the fuck do I want from life?

  1. I want to retire early (I don’t want to work)
  2. I want to raise kids in a loving family
  3. I want a loving partner who will stay together with me
  4. I want to explore my random interests
  5. I want to travel and explore different things in this world
  6. I want to create something that leaves a mark in this world that is meaningful to me



My Secret Notebook

Quirky, curious, and philosophical Asian American gay Ivy League grad living in Southern California.