I was just let go — my feelings and thoughts

My Secret Notebook
2 min readApr 3, 2024

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I’ll come out and just admit it: I was working another w-2 job. And my second w-2 job just let me go.

I’m feeling shocked and kind of sad, but at the same time, I wanted this lol.

My body is reacting in a way that it does when something bad happens and I’m in shock. I think it’s because of all the good-byes I said and the actually social elements.

I have nobody to talk to, recap, and debrief with, which kind of feels anti-climactic, but I’m in a way better position than anyone just working one job when it comes to having just been let go lol.

They said the position was eliminated, but I think it’s obvious why: I didn’t know how to do SQL and data pulls myself (boss asked me directly if I can, and I said no just basic stuff; I was ready to be fired at that point lol). I was also taking a long time to do things.

At one point, my boss just stopped including me and asking me for stuff. I thought it’d be smooth sailing, but I also had a feeling I might be let go. But today felt super sudden with no warning.

I do still feel shaken, and in some ways, it’s like I failed. I failed to show my value, and I failed to keep the job. At the same time, I feel like it’s a big win. At least, I know it is. I wanted to get rid of the job, and I was getting too overwhelmed.

I made my money, I invested it, and now I can get rid of this job too with 6 weeks severance! It’s a fucking win-win lol.

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My Secret Notebook

Quirky, curious, and philosophical Asian American gay Ivy League grad living in Southern California.